Spaced Invaders Review

When I was little Dad would rent some of the weirdest and most obscure movies from the video rental stores. Recently I've looked up some of the titles I remember and found some of them on the internet here and there. One of these weird and obscure movies was a terrible movie from 1990 called Spaced Invaders. It was a produced by Touchstone Pictures, a division of Walt Disney studios, and was so bad that no one remembers it other than some Millennials who happened to get a kick out of is as small children. Sure, I laughed a few times, but it's still really bad.

The space armada from Mars is fighting an interstellar war against their long-time enemy, the Arcturans. An incompetent crew of a small Martian spaceship intercept a distress signal from the fleet, followed by a Halloween rebroadcast of Orson Welles' 1938 The War of the Worlds radio dramatization from Earth. Mistaking this for a real invasion and not wanting to miss out on the glory, they land their ship in the tiny community of Big Bean, Illinois. It happens to be Halloween and it happens the invaders are only about four feet tall. As the bumbling aliens wander around the countryside, they are taken to be children in Halloween costumes and they make friends with two children, Kathy (Ariana Richards) and Brian (J.J. Anderson), one of whom is the daughter of the Sheriff Sam Hoxly (Douglas Barr). As their troubles mount (it's difficult for five aliens to conquer a world) they begin to give up their plans of conquest, but then there is that nasty Enforcer Droid, tasked to keep the Martian soldiers in line.

Upon this recent viewing of Spaced Invaders I noticed Ariana Richards at once. She's probably best known for play Lex Murphy (one of the two kids) in Jurassic Park. Jurassic Park was released three years after Spaced Invaders, so she looks particularly young in this movie. I looked up several other cast members. J.J. Anderson went on to play an extra in the Casper movie five years later. Spaced Invaders seems to be the height of Douglas Barr's acting career, which is really sad. It seems there was a Royal Dano in the movie who plays the local "old coot." He had a filmography comprising a bunch of old western films that I doubt anyone remembers. It seems that the whole cast was B-list material.

Spaced Invaders seems like a late summer cash grab. It's the kind of movie that is completely without value and was made to earn some money in the box office between major titles that have better production value. The effects were not bad, but hardly state of the art for its day. The props and effects deserve some notice for being frankly phony in the spirit of low-budget space movies from the 1950's; the Marians look like they bought their costumes at a local novelty shop. The characters are stock characters you've all seen before; the hopeful girl, the weird friend, the struggling single parent, etc.

The premise of the plot is amusing enough, but about half way through there is a profoundly illogical plot twist. Something about the space-time continuum causing a black hole that will destroy the solar system if the Marians don't leave Earth by a certain time. Spaced Invaders really is an attempt to make some money with a cut-and-paste family comedy that has no soul and is terrible any way you look at it. It exists solely to get kids to drag their parents to the movie theater, not unlike the many Alvin and the Chipmunks and Smurfs movies that have been clogging up theaters over the last few summer like a backed up truck stop toilet.

I remember finding Spaced Invaders funny as a kid, so in that regard the movie succeeded in what it set out to do. Seven-year-old me enjoyed the silly, brainless entertainment it provided. I now contend that the reason for growing up and getting an education is to learn why movies like Spaced Invaders is a waste of time. And yet, a small, far-away voice inside of me reminds me there once was a time when I liked this movie, when I was young and open to wonderment. Most of the weird humor falls flat and the sparse few lines I remember from childhood simply aren't funny anymore. There were a number of wacky slapstick gags that utilized cartoon physics to wonderful effect, and some of those still got a boisterous laugh out of me. Everything else was so lousy and juvenile I'm almost embarrassed to say I re-watched this.

I liked Spaced Invaders as a kid, I don't think it holds up today, though. It's so full of movie family comedy clichés you could almost say you've seen it before even if you have not. There is a certain charm in the movie's naive look; it lets kids know it's all play, and they don't have to worry too much about being unpleasantly scared. Even as an adult, there were a couple of things I still laughed at, so it's worth a few laughs if you must see it. It is otherwise a goofy, bubble-headed comedy that probably would not hold the attention of anyone over the age of 10. This certainly isn't worth seeking out a copy to add to your collection. But if you do want to see it, or show it to your kids, I'll have a link posted below.

I saw Spaced Invaders on YouTube. Like most full-length movies to be found there, it probably wasn't posted with Touchstone's consent, so I don't know how long it will be up there. But here's the link if you want to check it out yourself: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=59NfUZ30XmA

What are some really bad movies you remember enjoying as a kid that you don't care for so much as an adult? Comment below and let me know!

Duel Review

Steven Spielberg is responsible for some of the best and most iconic movies of our day. It's thanks to him that we have classics like Saving Private Ryan, Schindler's List, Indiana Jones, Jaws, Jurassic Park, and many others. But even the greatest film directors had to start somewhere. The very first full-length theatrical released film Spielberg directed is Duel (1971) when he was twenty-two years old. It's fascinating to observe Spielberg's earliest work in film to see where he started from and where his skills have taken him.

David Mann (Dennis Weaver), a mild mannered electronics salesman, is driving cross-country on a two-lane highway when he encounters an old oil tanker driven by an unseen driver who seems to enjoy annoying him with dangerous antics on the road. Unable to escape the demonic big rig, David finds himself in a dangerous game of cat and mouse with the monstrous truck. When the pursuit escalates to deadly levels, David must summon his inner warrior and turn the tables on his tormentor.

To be fair, Duel wasn't originally a theatrical release movie. It was a television released movie funded, produced, and distributed by ABC for their ABC Movie of the Week, a weekly television anthology series of made-for-TV movies. Eventually it was released to cinemas in Europe and Australia and had a limited cinema release to some venues in the United States. The film's success enabled Spielberg to establish himself as a film director.

Even for a made-for-TV movie, it's pretty good. The paranoia David has about the demonic big rig is reminiscent of the fear and paranoia so beautifully depicted in many of Hitchcock's films. Taking another page from Hitchcock, young Spielberg doesn't completely show us our "monster," thus allowing the audience's imagination to run away with us. The mind fills in the gaps in full detail far better than the movie could. It's fascinating to see how well Spielberg grasped these film making concepts from such a young age.

Spielberg insisted on shooting on location; that is filming on a highway rather than on a soundstage. I appreciate this because nothing looks worse than a car prop on a soundstage with a green screen backdrop; the actor is obviously sitting perfectly, comfortably still while there is lots of movement outside the windows. Taking the small budget into consideration, the camera work was very impressive. The same scenes had to be shot numerous times with the cameras mounted at different locations on the vehicles. The editing was also impressive, since we always get a clear sense of where the car and big rig are in comparison to each other. Since a bulk of the movie is these two vehicles driving adjacent to one another, I'm sure the editing was tricky, but the result was spot on.

A common Spielberg technique is to capture a lot of energy in a shot with a low angle and fast movement. I think it's safe to say he learned this technique while filming Duel. When we first encounter the Big Rig, we see it from  a low angle as the camera moves in one sweeping shot that moves from David in his car to the big rig in front of him while still in motion. We don't see the whole big rig in the shot, which shows us how very large and intimidating this vehicle is. The big rig is, in fact, a scary looking truck, but the way the camera captures it makes it seem all the more threatening. It's fascinating to see how these techniques that Spielberg is known for, were used early in his career.

Since most of the movie is focused on David while he is alone in his car, Duel doesn't lend itself to a lot of dialogue. Nevertheless, David as a character, is well established and we see him develop and grow as the movie progresses. There is a scene when Duel does something that movies should avoid, and that is have a voiceover to express what a character is thinking. Movies are a visual medium and must rely as much as possible upon showing an audience what is happening or what a character is thinking rather than telling us through voiceover or narration. But Duel manages to do this tactfully. Throughout most of the movie we are shown action that elicits our emotional reactions which are then reciprocated through David's expressions, allowing us to know what he is thinking. But on the few occasions we do hear his voiceover thoughts, they are expressing thoughts and concerns that are more complicated than could be expressed with just a facial expression, such as when David talks to himself as he tries to formulate a plan. I feel like the voiceover is a bit of a rookie mistake, but Spielberg was, in fact, a rookie here. The voiceover is used minimally and effectively and the movie relies foremost upon showing us, rather than telling us, what is going on.

Duel is an gripping cat-and-mouse thriller movie. Since it was a made-for-TV movie of the 1970's, it remains safely in the PG range, even with a couple profane words. It's an exciting, well developed story that reminded me of some classic Hitchcock films on some level. It's not as action-packed as I'm sure some modern audience members might expect these days, but it's still a solid film. Duel's rusted, growling tanker truck is an obvious predecessor to the man-eating Great White of Jaws, and it's every bit as terrifying. If you are a fan of film history, I highly recommend seeing Duel just to see Spielberg's earliest work that influenced his later work. Even if you are not a fan of film history , it's still a good movie and is worth seeing. Just for its historical significance, I'd like to get my own copy of this film.

There are a number of great movie directors out there. What are some early titles from iconic directors that are worth seeing to appreciate their artistic development? Comment below and tell me about it!

Jurassic World Review

I maintain to this day that Jurassic Park is one of my all time favorite movies. It is still the best dinosaur movie out there. I was ten when I saw it in theaters back in the day and it was so scary to me then that I had to see it twice before I actually saw the whole thing; I kept covering up my eyes. I was elated to hear about the new Jurassic World (2015) along with countless other enthusiastic fan boys. While it didn't quite live up to the greatness of that first Jurassic Park, it perfectly catered to my nostalgia for that beloved movie.

Twenty-two years after the original Jurassic Park failed, Isla Nublar now features a fully functioning dinosaur theme park, Jurassic World, as originally envisioned by John Hammond and run by the park's operations manager Claire Dearing (Bryce Dallas Howard). After ten years of operation and visitor rates declining, in order to fulfill a corporate mandate, a new attraction is created to re-spark visitors' interest; the vicious and intelligent Indominus Rex. When the massive creature escapes, it sets off a chain reaction that causes the other dinosaurs to run amok. Now, it's up to a former military man and the park's Velociraptor expert and trainer Owen Grady (Chris Pratt) to use his special skills to save Claire's nephews Zach (Nick Robinson) and Grey Mitchell (Ty Simpkins), as well as the rest of the tourists from an all-out prehistoric assault.

Contrary to popular belief, Steven Spielberg, the director of the first two Jurassic Park films, did not direct Jurassic World, but acted as executive producer just as he had for the third film. Director Colin Trevorrow either took a lot of advice from Spielberg or he managed to replicate Spielberg's style, from the way the camera moves to the gradual rolling out of the big effects. There were many parts of the movie that felt a lot like Jurassic Park which will placate the many fans' nostalgia for the original film. There are dozens of references to the original Jurassic Park movie both subtle and overt. Make sure you watch for them because it made me so happy to see them.

There's a decent cast in Jurassic World. None of the characters are particularly deep, nor do they do anything entirely unexpected. Claire is this corporate, unfeeling ice queen that only seems to see the sales numbers and is completely, intellectually removed from the animals featured in the park she runs. She even refers to the dinosaurs as "assets", as if they were products, not life forms. Owen is also not deep, but is a whole lot of fun. Chris Pratt usually plays comical, goofy characters. While Owen has a couple of humorous lines, he basically serves as this manly tough guy, not unlike Indiana Jones. Owen and Claire bounce off each other really well and have great chemistry. They and other characters aren't very deep, but the whole cast is likable and are at least somewhat relatable.

Jurassic Park had this highly interesting theme of control; we try to control our environment, control is an illusion, life finds a way, etc. I thought Jurassic World would play on that theme, especially since the word "control" is used at least a dozen times in the first twenty minutes of the movie. It does play on that theme a little bit, however Jurassic World was more about consumerism and corporate excess, for which the Indominus Rex was the thematic embodiment. We as consumers are surrounded by wonder and yet we want more, and we want it bigger, faster, louder, and better. In Jurassic World the Indominus Rex is a genetic hybrid animal which was designed based on a series of corporate focus groups. That twisted mutation of nature says something about our greed as consumers and about the desire for profit we see within corporate excess. The Indominus Rex represents that desire left unchecked and it demands to be satisfied. This theme is further illustrated by all the brand names and corporate logos seen throughout the park. Claire represents the corporate excess, her nephews represent consumers who want bigger and better, and Owen represents the ideal harmony between balance the two. This was best illustrated in a scene where Owen and Claire are inspecting the Indominus Rex's containment habitat. Claire explains "Corporate felt that genetic modification would up the 'wow' factor." Owen ingenuously replies, "They're dinosaurs. 'Wow' enough." There also a subtler theme of "those who do not stop evil are supporting and encouraging it," which I also appreciated.

Jurassic World ended up being a great action adventure movie. There were plenty of scares, tension, and surprises. The action and fight scenes were phenomenally well choreographed. The camera moved steadily through high energy scenes without resorting to that irritating and sloppy "shaky cam" gimmick and still captured all the movement in such a way that you could always very clearly tell what was happening. There were surprisingly few jump scares. A lot of the surprises took the form of growing dread. For example, there's a scene where Grey and Zach are in the back of an armored truck with its back doors open and a velociraptor in pursuit at top speed. It's not a question of a surprise attack, it's not a question of will it attack, the raptor is going to attack within a few seconds and they can do nothing but watch it get closer and closer. There is lots of tension and it makes for an exciting movie. It's still PG-13, most of the implied gore takes place off screen, but this still might be a bit too intense for younger audiences no matter how much they want to see a dinosaur movie. You might end up taking your kid to see it more than once just so they can see the whole thing as was the case for me twenty-two years ago.

There were certainly aspects of Jurassic World I didn't appreciate so much, but I think the only thing that truly bothered me was the use of John William's original Jurassic Park theme song at the wrong time. When we first hear this song it is accompanied by Jurassic Park's main characters (and the audience) seeing a heard of dinosaurs for the first time. Nothing quite like this scene had ever been done in film before, The magnificence of the scene as captured by Spielberg's camera work, coupled with the brilliant technical achievement of special effects, was only perfected by the dramatic swelling music provided by the iconic movie composer. This same song was used as we and Zach and Grey simply see the park for the first time. Sure, the park looks good, but the majestic, dramatic music almost seems cheapened by the fact that we're just looking at the entry of a theme park, rather than a never-before-seen cinematic achievement.

Jurassic World offers one-dimensional characters with nonsensical motivation, a decent cast, retrograde gender politics, some silly pseudo-science, and a whole lot of fun. It combined enough nostalgia, technical wizardry, and over-the-top thrilling moments to make fans of the original feel like kids again. Let us just take a moment to reflect on the fact that Chris Pratt rides a motorcycle to lead a pack of velociraptors to take down genetic monster which is terrorizing tourists. That preposterous situation alone is so ridiculously awesome that you can't help but enjoy it. As a fan of Jurassic Park, I loved Jurassic World. It did some lousy things here and there, but it also did lots of the sort of thing I wanted to see from a Jurassic Park movie. The 3D effects were even good. I highly recommend seeing this on the big screen, and it's very much worth getting a copy when it hits blu-ray.

What is the best non-Jurassic Park dinosaur movie out there? Comment below and let me know!

Last Action Hero Review

Back in the year 1993, a phenomenal movie was released and became a classic movie and one of the director's best known films. I am, of course, talking about Jurassic Park. The very next week after Jurassic Park hit theaters another movie was released called Last Action Hero. Most of its audiences were people who were going to see Jurassic Park but tickets were sold out, leaving them to settle for Last Action Hero. Critics also gave Last Action Hero predominantly negative reviews, and with good reason; as a piece of fiction it is pretty lousy, but as a ridiculous comedy that satirizes action films it's golden.

Young Danny Madigan (Austin O'Brian) is a big fan of Jack Slater, a larger-than-life action hero played by Arnold Schwarzenegger. When his best friend, Nick the projectionist (Art Carney), gives Danny a magic ticket to the new Jack Slater film, Danny is transported into Slater's world, where the good guys always win. One of Slater's enemies, Benedict the hit man, gets hold of the ticket and ends up in Danny's world, where he realizes that if he can kill the real Arnold Schwarzenegger, Slater will be no more. Slater and Danny leave the movie to stop Benedict, but movie rules don't apply in the real world and with Benedict bringing villains from other movies to the real world can he be stopped?

Last Action Hero was before its time. Before Hot Fuzz, Shaun of the Dead, or Zombieland, there was Last Action Hero. This movie takes the quintessential movie star of that era and put him in a spoof of his own genre. For all the roles Schwarzenegger has played, he has a non-existent range. He's good at squinting, smirking, and standing up while keeping his back straight, but not as convincing as the viewer that he's anyone other than Arnold Schwarzenegger. He's incapable of disappearing into a role, instead of becoming a character, the character becomes him. That ends up being the central punch line of most of his comedies; it's funny to see him do something un- Schwarzeneggerian. That tends to make his comedies pretty bad.

Last Action Hero fails as fiction because the movie didn't properly distinguish between the real world and the world of the movie-within-the-movie and never defined the parameters of either. For instance, after Danny gets sucked into the fictional Schwarzenegger movie Jack Slater IV, he discovers that characters from other movies, like Terminator 2: Judgment Day's T-1000 (a cameo by Robert Patrick), also inhabit this universe. But if the T-1000 is a real person in the movie-within-the-movie, then why does the actual film Terminator 2 also exist in the same world (albeit starring Sylvester Stallone)? If Jack Slater loses his invulnerability upon entering Danny's "real" world, then why do other movies characters such as Death (Ian McKellen) from The Seventh Seal retain their powers after being freed from their movie? And why does Danny's world seem so fake and saturated with in-jokes and movie references as Jack Slater IV?

Because everything is so malleable, the humor no longer rests in the violation of rules (which don't seem to exist) or screen personas, but in the imaginative co-mingling of intentional crassness and non-logic. Danny is transported into Jack Slater IV in the middle of a car chase. Slater shoots a bad guy, who gets thrown into an ice cream truck, which then promptly explodes. Cue another bad guy keeling over, with an ice cream cone lodged in the back of his head. "I iced that guy," says Slater, before adding "To cone a phrase." That's just hilarious, not so much because it satirizes a trope, but because of a complex interaction of intentionally unreal and parody elements of things we recognize and things that ignore both common sense and physics.

A lot of the humor is like this. It further goes on to satirize action tropes. Once in the real world, Benedict tries to lure Slater by killing someone. In the movies, this usually attracts the hero to start a fight. But even when shouting to the neighborhood that he's shot someone, nothing happens. Slater also is confused that there are no obvious clues left behind by henchmen as to where the bad guys can be found. A lot of movies are parodied or referenced in this movie including Die Hard, Hamlet, The Wizard of Oz, E.T., Blade Runner, Amadeus, both Terminator movies, The Nightmare on Elm Street, Witness, Lethal Weapon, Rambo III, Total Recall, and many others. Not to mention the many action movie star cameos.

One thing that makes a good movie good, is that it sets up rules and then breaks them. Take Jurassic Park; the rules are that barriers protect visitors from dinosaurs and that the dinosaurs can't reproduce. These rules are deliberately broken ("life finds a way"), and it makes the story interesting. Last Action Hero can't accomplish that because what makes it special also dooms it; though it satirizes narrative rules, it never completely adheres to one, making the movie's "reality" all wonky. It goes from a fictional reality to a real fiction to a fictional fiction to a cartoon-like narrative and then back to the fictional reality again. It makes for a weak story that is hard to take seriously as a piece of writing. But the satire of action movies is really quite entertaining.

Last Action Hero is technically not a good movie any way you look at it. The special effects weren't even that good for its day. The humor is often weird but still earns lots of laughs. The satire is strange and yet so poignant and interesting that it makes the movie a lot more fun than it should. I highly recommend seeing Last Action Hero, especially if you're a movie buff. It's fun and much more intelligently written than it seems to realize. I think this oft-overlooked movie deserves to be rediscovered.

Here's the trailer to give you more of a feel for movie's satire:

What is your favorite movie satire? Comment below and let me know!