Real Steel Movie Review

When I reviewed Battleship I mentioned a few other toy products that would make fairly ridiculous movies. I didn’t really think of the “Rock’em Sock’em Robot” toys which features two plastic robot boxers mechanically manipulated by the players as movie material. However, boxing robots trying to knock each other’s heads off is pretty much the whole idea behind Real Steel (2011).

In the near future people became uninterested in boxing and similar sports, so a new sport was created; Robot Boxing features robots battling each other while being controlled by someone. Charlie Kenton (Hugh Jackman), a former boxer who’s trying to make it in the new sport, not only doesn’t do well, he’s deeply in the red from all his losses. When he learns that his ex-wife, mother of his son Max (Dakota Goyo), has died, Charlie goes to figure out what to do with his estranged son. Max's wealthy aunt Debra (Hope Davis) and uncle Marvin (James Rebhorn) want full custody, so Charlie asks Marvin for money so he can buy a new robot in exchange for turning Max over to them. Charlie reluctantly takes Max for the summer and together they build and train a champion contending robot with the help of Charlie’s child hood mechanic friend, Bailey Tallet (Evangeline Lilly). As the stakes in the brutal, no-holds-barred arena are raised, Charlie and Max against all odds, get one last shot at a comeback.

Real Steel was a corny amalgamation of cliché storytelling tropes. You’ve got the underdog sports player seeking self respect, who miraculously gets a shot at the championship title as seen in Rocky; powerful mechanical robots that fight with each other, very similar to those in Transformers; a weird sport in which the whole world is unanimously invested, like you would see in Pokémon or even The Hunger Games, and all the cheesiness you’ll find in every father-son bonding story. Technically, each of these aren’t bad, but they can be presented in such a way that makes your eyes roll when they exceed credibility or try to emphasize more drama than can be milked from such a concept. Real Steel didn’t manage to make any of it credible and it just comes across as cheesy. You’ll probably laugh at the movie more because it’s hard to take seriously rather than at the sparse moments of the comic relief.

More often than not kid characters are put in a movie to appeal to younger audiences, and they serve no other purpose than that. Truly illogical kid characters will be able to outwit adults who have years more experience and knowledge, have skills that even a child prodigy couldn’t realistically have without a couple of years of post-secondary schooling, and have keen insight to things far beyond their limited experience. For all that these characters can do, why not just have them be a young adult who has that kind of knowledge base and experience? Do movie producers genuinely think that kids will only enjoy movies that feature other kids in it?

That has to be the reasoning behind Max’s character being a kid. At age eleven he can speak fluent Japanese, understands complex fighting techniques, and how to program and construct advanced mechanical automatons. Max also gives useful advice to Charlie, who has been in robot boxing circles for years before Max was born. And get this; he knows how to do all this because he plays video games. Seriously!? I’ve been playing video games for well over 20 years and I can’t do any of that stuff! That really makes the script writer sound like an old fogey who believes that all these crazy newfangled video game and technology things somehow unlock hidden powers and knowledge in young people. This isn’t just a vague excuse to justify a child character who should more reasonably be an adult; it’s just bad writing.

The fighting robots were unabashedly fun, fortunately. The handful of robot boxing matches that the movie actually featured were engaging and exciting. The combination of real robots and CGI animation was seamless. The robots were well designed so no two looked the same, and they moved in such a way that felt like they actually had weight and mass to them. The fights were well choreographed so that it was evident who was winning, who had the upper hand, and why. The robot boxing matches were probably the only really good part of Real Steel; the characters certainly didn’t carry the story well.

Reel Steel is by no means an original film in terms of its base story. It’s so full of clichés, there is no way you haven’t seen this story before. At best it’s all the brainless fun of Rock’em Sock’em Robots while also flailing around to achieve the heart and drama of Rocky. Although the cast usually did a good job in their roles, they had some pretty lame material to work with. I hate seeing Hugh Jackman in such a corny role as this. It reminded me more of the “BattleBots” TV show from about 12 years ago. Personally, I don’t think Real Steel is worth watching but I could see it appealing to teen and preteen boys, Max’s irrationally implausible character aside. Even if you really want to see robots fighting, I’d try to borrow this from someone; I don’t think it is even worth the cost of a movie rental.

What’s your favorite fictional sports movie? The Hunger Games? Quidditch from Harry Potter? Podracing from Star Wars? Can you think of others? Comment below and tell me why you like these fictional sports!

John Carter Movie Review

Way back in the early 1900’s an author by the name of Edgar Rice Burroughs wrote a series of pulp fiction stories. It was originally serialized as Under the Moons of Mars and was later published as a novel called A Princess of Mars. Ten sequels followed over the next three decades. Disney had bought the rights to make a film version of this book series back in the 1980’s. After being abandoned many times, Andrew Stanton (director of Pixar’s Finding Nemo and WALL-E) stepped up to the plate. Finally we received the John Carter movie in 2012, on the centennial anniversary of the first publication.

John Carter (Taylor Kitsch) is a world weary Civil War veteran who is tired of fighting other people’s wars and for their “noble” causes. While escaping being drafted into another battle for the military, he seeks refuge in a cave where he finds someone holding a strange medallion. When Carter touches it, he finds himself transported to a strange place where he can leap incredible heights and distances, as well as possessing amazing strength. Carter becomes reluctantly embroiled in a conflict among the inhabitants which include an alien leader Tars Tarkas (Willem Dafoe) and a human-like Princess Dejah Thoris (Lynn Collins). Carter learns from Dejah that he is on the planet earthlings call Mars and that his superhuman strength is caused by the lower gravity on Mars. Their world is on the brink of collapse and only John Carter has the power to end the conflict.

Something to take into consideration is that the setting in John Carter is based on now-obsolete ideas that were popularized by astronomer Percival Lowell in the early 20^th Century. This is why there is life on Mars and a breathable atmosphere in this sci-fi/fantasy story. It’s also based on pulp fiction, which is known for its over-the-top ridiculous action sequences and unrealistic settings. If you take all of that into consideration, John Carter is a more enjoyable movie.

Even when taking that kind of source material into consideration, the physics were a bit silly. Carter leaps 20 stories into the air because of the low gravity on Mars, but he still falls at the same speed he would on Earth. You’d expect his legs to break once he hits the ground falling that fast, but of course that doesn’t happen. Furthermore, Carter and the tribal aliens he teams up with bring swords and spears to go into battle against flying ships with laser cannons, and they still somehow manage to put up a decent fight. I’m going to use the “pulp fiction source material” excuse for that, too. It’s just visually a bit hard to swallow.

I’ve now seen Taylor Kitsch take on three different characters; Gambit in X-MenOrigins: Wolverine, Lieutenant Alex Hopper in Battleship, and John Carter. Yes, they are all action movies, but he really does an impressive job portraying different personalities. He’s far from a favorite of mine; I haven’t always liked the roles he’s played (such as Gambit), but he is a pretty good actor and did a fine job as John Carter.

John Carter didn’t seem to know if it was for kids or adults. On the one hand it has plenty of humorous scenes. I liked the part where he’s trying to adjust to Mars’ gravity. But on the other hand, it’s also kind of violent; decapitation and heavy-duty sword play aren’t uncommon here. I suppose that since the alien’s blood is blue, Disney assumed it wouldn’t be off-putting for younger viewers. Really, it’s not too bad, but I don’t think I’d want anyone under the age of 8 to watch it.

John Carter is a fun movie. The editing is a bit choppy and the pacing is kind of slow. It’s exciting, funny, and its visual effects are not bad. It is pure, joyous, escapist adventure cinema. You really have to take it for what it is; a fun action movie that requires very little thought. Edgar Rice Burroughs is best known for writing the Tarzan stories, but you can see how this sort of material (circa 1912’s) influenced a lot of science fiction, fantasy, and superhero adventures. If you like those kinds of stories, you’ll probably enjoy John Carter on at least some level. You just have to take some of it with a grain of salt. I enjoyed it, but not enough to want my own copy to watch over and over again. I recommend seeing it, even if it is another attempt for Disney to strike gold like they did with Pirates of the Caribbean. It’s worth the cost of a RedBox rental, but not the cost of the Blu-Ray.

Do you have a favorite Sci-Fi/Fantasy movie? Like, where you're not sure if it's one or the other? What is it? Comment below and let me know!

Battleship Movie Review

Hasbro has made a few movies based on their toy products. Some of these include Clue (1985), G.I. Joe: the Rise of Cobra (2009), and the Transformers movies. Film adaptations of other Hasbro games would be hilarious: Jenga? Hungry Hungry Hippos? Connect 4? Most of us rolled our eyes in exasperation when we first heard news about a movie based on the famous board game, but Peter Berg's Battleship (2012) wasn't half bad.

After irresponsible beach bum Alex Hopper (Taylor Kitsch) is arrested for a reckless stunt, his older brother, Stone Hopper (Alexander Skarsgard), demands that Alex make something of himself and insists that he join him in the Navy. Alex's stunt was supposed to impress Samantha Shane (Brooklyn Decker), but since she is the daughter of Stone's Navel commanding officer, Admiral Shane (Liam Neeson), it reflected poorly on Stone. Meanwhile, a transmission is being sent into deep space to see if there is intelligent life on a nearby Earth-like plant. In as much time as it takes to get Alex into a uniform and on a U.S. Destroyer, five alien crafts enter our solar system in tight formation. The U.S. destroyers exchange fire with the alien crafts which prove to be formidable opponents. Two Naval ships are destroyed, one of which was commended by Stone. After several officers on Alex's ship die, he is left as the highest ranking officer, and must take command. As this is happening, Samantha is revealed to be a physical therapist working with Army vet Mick Canales (real life Iraq hero, Colonel Gregory D. Gadson). They meet Cal Zapata (Hamish Linklater) who has escaped from the communications relay which was taken over by the aliens. The aliens are trying to use the satellite relay to call for reinforcements.

Battleship is loosely based on the board game of the same name. If you keep a sharp eye out for them, you can find subtle references to the game.  The officers find a way to track the alien ships' underwater movements using weather buoys. The resulting display grid resembles the Battleship game board. The Aliens make a gigantic force field around their splashdown area, trapping some of the Navy ships inside. So it's a few Navy ships versus the alien ships; a finite combat area with no external interference, just like the board game. Also, the aliens launch large explosive canisters at the Navy ships which get lodged in the hull for a few seconds then explode. These canisters are shaped like the pegs used in the board game to mark hits. These are subtle references; the movie isn't trying to sell us a Battleship board game.

The characters in Battleship aren't very complex or deep. Yet they are still more interesting than the characters we saw in Transformers. Alex resembles a lot of swashbuckler-type characters from recent movies; fearless, energetic, foolhardy, disobedient, and unpredictable, yet they excel despite their impertinence. He's like Captain Kirk on Star Trek (2009) or just about any character that Sam Worthington has played. Rihanna portrays Petty Officer Cora 'Weps' Raikes and was pretty good for what she was; a butt-kicking female protagonist who also exhibits creativity and resourcefulness. This was this R&B/pop star's first acting role; she did very well. Colonel Gadson, an American bilateral above-the-knee amputee, did a fantastic job in this role. In Battleship he plays a war veteran who lost his legs and feels it makes him less of a man; unable to perform even some of the most mundane tasks. He's a great character with a powerful presence. He grows, regaining self-respect, and again accepts the call of duty.

Holding true to B-movie formats; we send out an invitation to possible alien life forms to make contact with us, the call is answered, and without bothering to communicate, the military fires on the aliens. At several points in Battleship we're given reason to think the aliens may not be here to invade or destroy; they primarily attack our weapon structures (military vessels, weapon depots, etc.), and even then it's only after being fired upon. This could have made an interesting plot device, but the movie didn't do anything with it. There isn't a specific villain; just a faceless army that shows us only a few troops. Because the aliens have no lines and don't necessarily seem have malicious intentions, it weakens the conflict.

Battleship isn't simply a nonstop barrage of special effects and explosions. The story and characters are a bit more intricate than Transformers 2: Revenge of the Fallen, though that's not saying much; it's still overall a weak movie. Battleship honors war veterans throughout the movie, especially in Canales' character. Veterans are shown to be real heroes before, and are fully capable of being heroes again if called upon. It's a perfect Memorial Day movie. Battleship wasn't great, but it was a fun time for what it was if you can ignore the writing tropes and silliness. I could see it becoming a cult classic one day. It's still cheesy, but not as much as we expected it to be, we can still laugh at it and enjoy it, and it's based on a board game for crying out loud! It might be worth seeing once; catching it on DVD would be fine, but a matinee ticket will show you some pretty great explosions on the big screen. I don't think it's worth owning a copy, though.

Did you see Battleship? Did you like it? Did you hate it? What do you think of movies based on board games? Comment below and let me know!